Opting Out of the Outrage Horde

When you encounter someone addicted to the dopamine cycle, what do you do?

I’ve tried leading with curiosity, as you can’t help someone move to a better place if you’re not willing to meet them where they’re at.

But this often leads to them being whipped into a frenzy about The Current Thing, while I regret pulling the thread that led to this one-directional trauma vomit of a conversation.

I’ve tried pushing back, but as the old saying goes: “they’ll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience”.

Though the truth is the modern dopamine cycle is insanely addictive, so you don’t have to be an idiot to become a junkie!

What other option is there but to step back and avoid that game entirely?

People say that this is apathy, but that just doesn’t feel right to me.

If a game is rigged, feeling like you have a ‘responsibility to play’ is an awfully convenient mindset from the perspective of the dealer; whose incentives often run in direct opposition to yours.

And even if you can make a solid case that playing the game is the ‘right’ thing to do, what if it leads to a worse life for you and the people you care about?

If everything went to hell in a hand basket, would you rather be the one saying:

“See, I told you so!”

Or:

“At least we tried, and I enjoyed the ride!”

As someone else once said, “if it’s not important 3 months from now, it was never important”.

I think many people on the dopamine cycle, if asked what flavor of the month things had their attention 3 months ago, would be able to accurately remember less than 10% of what they thought it was important.

So as I wrote to myself in a note a few years ago:

Focus on the micro, ignore the macro whenever possible.

This is part 2 in a series on escaping from the addiction of performative compassion, and spending your time, money, and attention on things that truly matter. Read the rest here.